Caught up in a moment
As I sit on the unmade bed, my arms full of dirty laundry I watch the cockatoo out the window, contemplating a quick visit to my peach tree. I Know my work load is not going to simply vanish but I can’t help but stop and admire this cheeky bird. Whilst the bathroom grows mould, the dust collects on photo frames and my pile of unfolded washing mounts higher, I sigh. I feel deflated, I remember a time when I travelled the world my life was full of exotic places and people. At forty-eight my energy levels drop after a morning of prompting my two beautiful children to get a wriggle on for school. When you have a child with a diffability you are constantly re-assessing how you could do things better. There are days when I feel like I never give enough for both my little lambs. So how I find the time to fill my void with the stuff of dreams is a struggle at best. A friend asked me the other day where do I go when I need a break, I laughed thinking I have not had a break for a long time. Yet I do go somewhere, into the folds of my imagination, there I find my peace.
The cockatoo walks sideways along the top of the swing set frame, one eye glued on me and the other on a nice juicy peach. He screeches, and sometimes he says hello. The bird conjures up stories in my head, it does not take much to find a storyline for me. The hard part is following it through to the end. I juggle time, I steal it when no one is watching. I must or my story will never get finished. My laptop stays open on the kitchen table. If something comes I write it down. I know there is rarely a chance amidst the chaos of life to write all day and that is what I would love to do. My feathered friend jumps on a branch grabs the first available peach and takes flight. No messing around straight down to business. I must do the same, set my goals and stick to them.
“First day of Autumn today mum, did you know that?” lectures my daughter in the car on the way to school. The penny drops, two months gone already and what have I done with my story. It is nearly finished but when I say finished I mean all the pieces fit together ready and waiting for the major edit. I share my grumbles here, hoping for a group therapy session. A meeting place where we sit in the sun on a roof top and discuss our latest projects. Hopefully March is a productive month. How about you?
Please join me on the rooftop and leave a comment, what are you working on, how do you stay focused on your goal?