WE ALL HAVE DAYS OF MELANCHOLY, YET THERE IS HOPE
The other day I felt like I had walked through an invisible field of melancholy, it clung to me as I made the trip down to the beach with my son. The numbing feeling that life is too hard. I do not wallow for hours in these pastures, the ones of negativity and self-doubt. I am an optimist and know that my internal dialogue needs a positive narrative, as much as I hate to admit it, I am only human after all. I am not a super mum I am someone who takes each day along with the good and the not so good I pick out the good bits, savouring them for days like these. I measure my emotions and assure myself it is only natural to feel down every once in a while.
I sat watching my boy on the beach trying to shake off the grimness, feeling sad was not going to help anyone least of all him. When you have a child on the spectrum, the challenges we face are many. In the end the fact is he will always be an original, also unique and talented, but oh so gorgeously different. When I go to the beach I often think of my Dad and wonder how he would handle certain issues. It occurred to me that his anniversary was only days away. I counted the years, seven years without his smile. Seven years without his strong hugs and seven years of missing his sense of silliness and fun. I imagined what life would be like if he was still here. My mood swung to an all time low.
It was then I heard a soft yodel, at first I thought I was imagining it, when I looked up into the sand dunes behind me, there sat a Magpie singing to the wind, with wings spread he sang the most melodious tune, so gentle and beautiful. I knew it was a message from the heavens. The sun shone through the storm clouds and I smiled.
I gave thanks for a Father who shared love and compassion, I gave thanks for my children and how different they are and how much they teach me every day. I gave thanks for a supportive loving husband and a giant-sized family to share this life. I dusted myself off and stood up knowing tomorrow would be a better day, if I just let it be.
That Magpie kept singing for the longest time. It was a magical minuscule moment that I will treasure. What little miracles or magic have you experienced just when you needed them? Please leave a comment I love hearing your stories.
GOOD MORNING EARTH
The morning frost upon the dawn
A song rings out, a melodious tune
Tis but a Magpie
A black and white bird.
Yet his song lifts the heaviest of hearts
He calls to me
Good morning earth
I give praise to thee
my one true gift
is a song for you.